What is your favorite family vacation story?
It can be either a story from when you were growing up,
after you left for college
or since you got married.
Enjoy -
Love, Dad
Friday, February 8, 2008
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Okay, Okay, here it is.....
Although it all started 30 years ago, there are some things about which memory never really fades. I don't know if this is going to be a ten-minute version or much longer: I'll just start typing and see where it leads.
I returned from my mission on December 27, 1977. In early January I was called to be the Ward Fellowshipping Chairman (a singles ward made-up calling which meant I was to watch out for the investigators and new members) and to teach the Gospel Essentials class. I was also asked to speak in both Stake Conference and Sacrament Meeting on the same Sunday (we used to still have a late Sacrament Meeting on the day of Stake Conference). I remember both my talks, and I remember being very enthusiastic and confident in both talks, but I do not remember meeting anyone new that Sunday. The following Sunday (still in January) I attended a large Ward Council meeting (thanks to all those made-up callings...) and was told by the ward mission leader about a few investigators and/or new members who would be in my Gospel Essentials class, which I was teaching for the first time that day. One investigator in particular was cause for some real excitement in ward council: David Dorff, because apparently they had been working with him for awhile without much progress, and suddenly he had told them he wanted to be baptized. He had attended church the previous week (when I spoke) and was going to be at church that day. Anyway, it took me awhile during my class to realize that the guy who was acting and sounding like a well-informed returned-missionary type, answering all my doctrinal questions and asking lots more, was this investigator I had heard about that morning! At first I thought he was really rude to come to the Gospel Essentials class and do all the talking, when we were supposed to be teaching new people about the basic doctrines; but when I realized he WAS a new person, I was blown away by his understanding and the depth of his questions. As the next few weeks went by, I realized that there were several awesome people in the class and that their faith was really growing, and I put lots of time and effort into preparing the lessons - there was no manual for the class - I created all the lessons myself, sort of expanding on concepts from the missionary discussions. The other thing I did as part of my calling was make a few phone calls and write notes to each of the people in the class to "fellowship" them. So I think I got to know them as well as anyone in the ward did. I remember one gab session with my friend and former roommate Jennifer (Moulton, now Hansen), where we discussed who the most eligible and interesting guys were. I remember having a list of 6 guys I thought were "interesting," and David Dorff was on the list, but he wasn't really near the top, probably because I thought of him as a new member, an untested believer, and I thought I should probably look for a good solid returned missionary. But he was definitely interesting! We saw each other at ward activities a few times, and I remember clearly attending his baptism on February 19, when his parents and little brother came to visit from California. His little brother was a new priest, and a lot smaller than David, and David had to kneel in the water in order for Michael to baptize him. A couple of weeks later I remember running into David in the church building between Sunday meetings and having him casually ask me if I would like to go to a Hasty Pudding production with him. I knew all about Hasty Pudding, but I don't think I had actually been before (memory is a little fuzzy on that....). Of course I said yes, and he said he would call me with the details. (Editor's note: many months later I found out that he had had the tickets for awhile, and his girlfriend was supposed to come from Smith for the weekend and go with him, but she dumped him when he joined the church, so he had 2 tickets and nobody to go with. He knew it should be someone from church and had narrowed it down to me and one other girl. I just happened to come around the corner at church first, before he had completely decided which one to ask!) Anyway, later in the week, just a few days before the date, he called to ask me if I had a long dress, because it was supposed to be formal! I had just come home from a mission, hadn't been to a prom-type event in many years, and none of those pre-church dresses were temple compatible anyway. Luckily I did have a Sunday type full lenth, short sleeved dress that I had actually sewn myself. It would have to do. He wore a tux, and it was more than a little awkward to be about the only female there in a modest (and homemade!)dress, but I survived. I drove my car and parked near his dorm on the side of a narrow Cambridge street. The dinner was at his "club" and he had orderd me Perrier (bubbly water) which I did not care for - not a good start. I felt pretty uncomfortable. We enjoyed the show - I don't even remember what it was, though. Afterwards it had started to snow quite a bit, and we walked back to the club and decided to play some pool. I remember winning (my claim to fame for many years afterwards, since I don't know if I ever beat him again), and then it was time for me to go home. We walked to my car and discovered that it was snowed in pretty well - the plows had come along and left a wall of snow for me to push through. Now, here's where the story differs depending on who tells it. I was an experienced snow driver, and David was a Southern California boy who had never driven in snow. We cleared away some of the snow, and then it was necessary for him to push my car forward so that I could get onto the pavement and get some traction. I thanked him before I got in the car and we said goodnight. He pushed a few times, the car rocked, and finally it pushed over the bank and into the street, and, having gotten some traction, I continued my forward motion and drove home. Apparently he was left behind face down in the snow after a huge last push, and he was astounded that I did not stop and come back! I drove home, thinking it had been a nice evening, but he wondered if I drove away so abruptly because I never wanted to speak to him again!
Well, he decided it was worth another try, and he called the next week to ask me out again for the weekend. I don't remember what our next dates were - we saw some movies, played more pool, sat and talked, went to church activities together.... He never got around to asking the other girl out! We dated through the month of March until it was Harvard's spring break, and he went home to California for 2 weeks. I had no idea that he would call or contact me, but he did! He sent flowers and called frequently! His mother later told me that she was amazed that he didn't go out with any girls the whole time he was home - she knew then that this was really serious because he had always dated multiple girls at the same time. Anyway, when he returned things took a serious turn - we started talking seriously about the future, even though we had really only been dating a few weeks. On April 12 (I think - I might be wrong though...) he was over at my apartment and we were sitting on the living room floor talking, and the conversation eventually went something like this: David: "Well, I guess I should ask you to marry me, shouldn't I?" Andi: "Yes, you should!" David: "Will you marry me?" Andi: "Yes!" To this day, he claims that I'm the one who proposed!
To back up a little bit: although my emotions were flying high all this time, I was also proceeding with caution and uncertainty because he was such a new member. As with all converts, he had so much to learn, and it made me scared and a little uncomfortable that his "instincts" weren't all where they should be yet. I was a recently returned missionary with definite ideas about what kind of man I should marry, and he wasn't it! He was also 4+ years younger than me, and still in school, while I had been on my own and a college graduate for 6 years already. Using reason alone, there was no way I would have chosen to marry him. But I didn't want to use emotions alone either. So, I prayed and prayed - I prayed hard! I got my answer, not as a powerful Ka-Blam, but as a feeling of peace and a gradual dissipation of the worry and concern. I was in love, but my eyes were also wide open. We had a lot to learn about each other, but we had time to do just that. We agreed that we would not be married outside of the temple, so we needed to wait until David had been a member for a year. He was graduating and returning to California for a job in June, and I had a job in Massachusetts. So I put in for a transfer within the Bell System, going from New England Telephone to Pacific Bell. The transfer came through in August, and David flew back to Boston from California, we attended my sister Marney's wedding, and then left right from their reception to begin the cross-country drive together. We stayed with a friend in Chicago, and another friend in Salt Lake, and finally chugged (literally, in my heavily loaded Vega hatchback, which couldn't go more than 45 up the hills) into Palos Verdes, California. David had gotten an apartment with Scott Frazier (the stake missionary from Cambridge who had taught him, then graduated from Harvard Business School and gotten a job in Los Angeles), and I moved into a room in his parents' house for 6 months, August 21 to February 21, our wedding day. It was an enlightening 6 months, to put it mildly! The Dorff family was very different from my Harriman family, more demonstrative, more casual, less modest, less reserved, and less proper. It took me awhile to loosen up, but I was happy there. David's one year anniversary, February 19, was a Monday and the temple was closed, so on Tuesday evening, after both of us had worked a full day, we went to the Los Angeles temple and he received his endowment. The next night, Wednesday, February 21, again after we both worked almost a full day - my boss kicked me out around 2:00 p.m. - we were married in a sealing room which was packed with San Pedro Ward members, but absolutely no family members for either of us. David's family waited in the foyer of the temple, but my family did not come to California, in essence boycotting the event which they could not accept. We never really had a honeymoon, although I guess Thursday was a day off for both of us and we moved my stuff into our new apartment (David had already moved in at the beginning of the month). Friday we flew to Boston, had a family dinner with both families, and Saturday was a reception at my parents' house in North Andover. Sunday we attended our old singles ward and then flew home to California and went to work Monday morning.
It was a whirlwind courtship (6 weeks from first date to engagement, including 2 weeks when David was in California and I was in Massachusetts), a long engagement (10 and a half months, including 2 months when he was starting his job in California and I was still at my old job in Boston), and 30 years after we met, here we are as grandparents!
Well, this took a lot longer than 10 minutes to write! There are lots more stories involved, and I'm sure David will mention some of them, but that's my version of our courtship and marriage. When I think about it now, I sure lucked out! I got a good man, even though I didn't understand just how good at first! I would never recommend that anyone make decisions as quickly as we did, especially where one is a new member, but the Spirit guided us, and has continued to bless our family all these years.
I returned from my mission on December 27, 1977. In early January I was called to be the Ward Fellowshipping Chairman (a singles ward made-up calling which meant I was to watch out for the investigators and new members) and to teach the Gospel Essentials class. I was also asked to speak in both Stake Conference and Sacrament Meeting on the same Sunday (we used to still have a late Sacrament Meeting on the day of Stake Conference). I remember both my talks, and I remember being very enthusiastic and confident in both talks, but I do not remember meeting anyone new that Sunday. The following Sunday (still in January) I attended a large Ward Council meeting (thanks to all those made-up callings...) and was told by the ward mission leader about a few investigators and/or new members who would be in my Gospel Essentials class, which I was teaching for the first time that day. One investigator in particular was cause for some real excitement in ward council: David Dorff, because apparently they had been working with him for awhile without much progress, and suddenly he had told them he wanted to be baptized. He had attended church the previous week (when I spoke) and was going to be at church that day. Anyway, it took me awhile during my class to realize that the guy who was acting and sounding like a well-informed returned-missionary type, answering all my doctrinal questions and asking lots more, was this investigator I had heard about that morning! At first I thought he was really rude to come to the Gospel Essentials class and do all the talking, when we were supposed to be teaching new people about the basic doctrines; but when I realized he WAS a new person, I was blown away by his understanding and the depth of his questions. As the next few weeks went by, I realized that there were several awesome people in the class and that their faith was really growing, and I put lots of time and effort into preparing the lessons - there was no manual for the class - I created all the lessons myself, sort of expanding on concepts from the missionary discussions. The other thing I did as part of my calling was make a few phone calls and write notes to each of the people in the class to "fellowship" them. So I think I got to know them as well as anyone in the ward did. I remember one gab session with my friend and former roommate Jennifer (Moulton, now Hansen), where we discussed who the most eligible and interesting guys were. I remember having a list of 6 guys I thought were "interesting," and David Dorff was on the list, but he wasn't really near the top, probably because I thought of him as a new member, an untested believer, and I thought I should probably look for a good solid returned missionary. But he was definitely interesting! We saw each other at ward activities a few times, and I remember clearly attending his baptism on February 19, when his parents and little brother came to visit from California. His little brother was a new priest, and a lot smaller than David, and David had to kneel in the water in order for Michael to baptize him. A couple of weeks later I remember running into David in the church building between Sunday meetings and having him casually ask me if I would like to go to a Hasty Pudding production with him. I knew all about Hasty Pudding, but I don't think I had actually been before (memory is a little fuzzy on that....). Of course I said yes, and he said he would call me with the details. (Editor's note: many months later I found out that he had had the tickets for awhile, and his girlfriend was supposed to come from Smith for the weekend and go with him, but she dumped him when he joined the church, so he had 2 tickets and nobody to go with. He knew it should be someone from church and had narrowed it down to me and one other girl. I just happened to come around the corner at church first, before he had completely decided which one to ask!) Anyway, later in the week, just a few days before the date, he called to ask me if I had a long dress, because it was supposed to be formal! I had just come home from a mission, hadn't been to a prom-type event in many years, and none of those pre-church dresses were temple compatible anyway. Luckily I did have a Sunday type full lenth, short sleeved dress that I had actually sewn myself. It would have to do. He wore a tux, and it was more than a little awkward to be about the only female there in a modest (and homemade!)dress, but I survived. I drove my car and parked near his dorm on the side of a narrow Cambridge street. The dinner was at his "club" and he had orderd me Perrier (bubbly water) which I did not care for - not a good start. I felt pretty uncomfortable. We enjoyed the show - I don't even remember what it was, though. Afterwards it had started to snow quite a bit, and we walked back to the club and decided to play some pool. I remember winning (my claim to fame for many years afterwards, since I don't know if I ever beat him again), and then it was time for me to go home. We walked to my car and discovered that it was snowed in pretty well - the plows had come along and left a wall of snow for me to push through. Now, here's where the story differs depending on who tells it. I was an experienced snow driver, and David was a Southern California boy who had never driven in snow. We cleared away some of the snow, and then it was necessary for him to push my car forward so that I could get onto the pavement and get some traction. I thanked him before I got in the car and we said goodnight. He pushed a few times, the car rocked, and finally it pushed over the bank and into the street, and, having gotten some traction, I continued my forward motion and drove home. Apparently he was left behind face down in the snow after a huge last push, and he was astounded that I did not stop and come back! I drove home, thinking it had been a nice evening, but he wondered if I drove away so abruptly because I never wanted to speak to him again!
Well, he decided it was worth another try, and he called the next week to ask me out again for the weekend. I don't remember what our next dates were - we saw some movies, played more pool, sat and talked, went to church activities together.... He never got around to asking the other girl out! We dated through the month of March until it was Harvard's spring break, and he went home to California for 2 weeks. I had no idea that he would call or contact me, but he did! He sent flowers and called frequently! His mother later told me that she was amazed that he didn't go out with any girls the whole time he was home - she knew then that this was really serious because he had always dated multiple girls at the same time. Anyway, when he returned things took a serious turn - we started talking seriously about the future, even though we had really only been dating a few weeks. On April 12 (I think - I might be wrong though...) he was over at my apartment and we were sitting on the living room floor talking, and the conversation eventually went something like this: David: "Well, I guess I should ask you to marry me, shouldn't I?" Andi: "Yes, you should!" David: "Will you marry me?" Andi: "Yes!" To this day, he claims that I'm the one who proposed!
To back up a little bit: although my emotions were flying high all this time, I was also proceeding with caution and uncertainty because he was such a new member. As with all converts, he had so much to learn, and it made me scared and a little uncomfortable that his "instincts" weren't all where they should be yet. I was a recently returned missionary with definite ideas about what kind of man I should marry, and he wasn't it! He was also 4+ years younger than me, and still in school, while I had been on my own and a college graduate for 6 years already. Using reason alone, there was no way I would have chosen to marry him. But I didn't want to use emotions alone either. So, I prayed and prayed - I prayed hard! I got my answer, not as a powerful Ka-Blam, but as a feeling of peace and a gradual dissipation of the worry and concern. I was in love, but my eyes were also wide open. We had a lot to learn about each other, but we had time to do just that. We agreed that we would not be married outside of the temple, so we needed to wait until David had been a member for a year. He was graduating and returning to California for a job in June, and I had a job in Massachusetts. So I put in for a transfer within the Bell System, going from New England Telephone to Pacific Bell. The transfer came through in August, and David flew back to Boston from California, we attended my sister Marney's wedding, and then left right from their reception to begin the cross-country drive together. We stayed with a friend in Chicago, and another friend in Salt Lake, and finally chugged (literally, in my heavily loaded Vega hatchback, which couldn't go more than 45 up the hills) into Palos Verdes, California. David had gotten an apartment with Scott Frazier (the stake missionary from Cambridge who had taught him, then graduated from Harvard Business School and gotten a job in Los Angeles), and I moved into a room in his parents' house for 6 months, August 21 to February 21, our wedding day. It was an enlightening 6 months, to put it mildly! The Dorff family was very different from my Harriman family, more demonstrative, more casual, less modest, less reserved, and less proper. It took me awhile to loosen up, but I was happy there. David's one year anniversary, February 19, was a Monday and the temple was closed, so on Tuesday evening, after both of us had worked a full day, we went to the Los Angeles temple and he received his endowment. The next night, Wednesday, February 21, again after we both worked almost a full day - my boss kicked me out around 2:00 p.m. - we were married in a sealing room which was packed with San Pedro Ward members, but absolutely no family members for either of us. David's family waited in the foyer of the temple, but my family did not come to California, in essence boycotting the event which they could not accept. We never really had a honeymoon, although I guess Thursday was a day off for both of us and we moved my stuff into our new apartment (David had already moved in at the beginning of the month). Friday we flew to Boston, had a family dinner with both families, and Saturday was a reception at my parents' house in North Andover. Sunday we attended our old singles ward and then flew home to California and went to work Monday morning.
It was a whirlwind courtship (6 weeks from first date to engagement, including 2 weeks when David was in California and I was in Massachusetts), a long engagement (10 and a half months, including 2 months when he was starting his job in California and I was still at my old job in Boston), and 30 years after we met, here we are as grandparents!
Well, this took a lot longer than 10 minutes to write! There are lots more stories involved, and I'm sure David will mention some of them, but that's my version of our courtship and marriage. When I think about it now, I sure lucked out! I got a good man, even though I didn't understand just how good at first! I would never recommend that anyone make decisions as quickly as we did, especially where one is a new member, but the Spirit guided us, and has continued to bless our family all these years.
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